It's strange how you can have days when you feel positive about everything, nothing can bring you down. Then you have those other days where you feel as though you are carrying the whole work, your knees are shaking and you start to panic, you need to drop it.
You suddenly feel as though you have so much work to do and it's never going to get done.
You miss everyone.
I miss my girlies back home. I hate the fact that I am at uni and should be having the time of my life but really they are probably having a much better time. Boyfriends, friends, work...all gets in the way.
I want to look forward to going home at Christmas, but it seems hard.
Last year I remember how much I wanted to get home, I climbed out of the car, it was dark and cold. I lugged all my laundry into the front room and hugged my mum. The house smelled like Christmas, spicy and warm. Sweet. Tea was cooking on the stove and I couldn't have been happier to be back at home. I had a room to snuggle into, I felt happy.
This year will be different. But I hope not too much. I miss everything. Things keep getting harder. We deserve a break.
I can't even bring myself to write about this in detail because I just get far too angry.
So instead, I am going to tidy up, buy a diet coke and start my essay.
Oh, and have a glorious shower with Lush.
Love.
xx
Hey just wanted to let you know I've been reading your blog for a while now and I love it. I don't feel so alone after reading it because you've experienced so much of the same stuff as me, i.e. problems at uni and stuff. I think my friends back home are having far more fun too! Anyway gonna go before a get all crazed-fan on your ass. Thanks for writing.
ReplyDeletelove, Lizzy xx